I am Resolved: A Manifesto

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Lately I have felt that I am not performing well as a muslimah. I can tell that my motivation is not what it use to be and that scares me. I am afraid of becoming a hypocrite or leaving my practice off altogether. I feel that my belief in Islam as the right path is as strong as ever, but my actions are not showing this. I know that I can do better and I am ashamed that I have let myself come to this point.

Issues

• leaving prayer until the end of time
• skipping sunnah and nafl prayers
• not making thikr
• not reading Qur'an
• not increasing in knowledge
• not giving charity
• not having concentration

I sincerely seek the forgiveness of Allah subhana wa ta3ala and ask for protection from the evil in my own self and the whispering of the shayateen.  I have the intention to do better from this moment on, to be steadfast in my religion and to be sincere in my worship.

I will achieve this inshaAllah by setting goals that are practical, measurable, and attainable so that I do not burn out quickly. Allah loves consistency, even if it is something small so inshaAllah I will be consistent. 

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I want to do this because I know that Allah deserves so much more than I can ever give in worship. He is my creator, provider, sustainer. I will never be able to repay Him for my existance and all of the blessings I have been given but it would compound the debt if I did nothing. I would show arrogance and ungratefulness if I let other concerns take precedent over my rabb.

InshaAllah I will make 5 goals for this week and re-asses next week depending on my performance. Goals which have been executed well or easily will be replaced by new goals and those that need work will continue on the list inshaAllah.

Goals

1. Pray in the early time (or make du3a when I can't pray salat).
2. Pray 2 sunnah before fajr and at least 1 rakah for witr (or make du3a al-qunoot when I can't make salat).
3. Read Quran bil3araby for at least 5 minutes each day, then read the English translation of the verses covered.
4. Say Bismillah before doing housework so that the things I do in the house are counted as 3ibada.
5. Make dhikr after each prayer before I get off of the sujada.

InshaAllah I will keep track of my daily progress and give weekly updates here in order to keep myself accountable.

InshaAllah this will help me to become a better slave of Allah, a better Muslimah, a better wife, a better human.